Once you get home, you will be busy settling in and bonding with your little one. Bonding occurs during the sensitive time in the first hours and days after birth when you as parents make a deep connection with your baby. Physical closeness can promote an emotional connection. It is therefore very important that you have enough time and energy to do this rather than hosting guests. Here are a few tips on how to handle your guests at home.
- Take care of yourself: Get enough rest and sleep to allow you recuperate. Ask that you are not woken up if visitors come. Or if there are meals to be prepared, ask the guests to help prepare the meals.
- Establish visiting rules especially for friends and colleagues that you might feel the need to “host”. Let them know the best times for you. Have some handwash or sanitizer close by for people to wash hands before holding the baby, and ask anyone who’s ill to avoid holding the baby. For close relatives and friends, let them care for the baby while you get some much-needed rest.
- Call friends especially those who are already mums so that you can unwind. Talking about what’s bothering you such as difficulty in adjusting to the new routine or difficulty soothing the baby can help you stay connected. A shared laugh may help lighten the mood.
- Relax your standards; it is okay if the house is not in its usual spick and span look. With a new baby comes a sense of a “lived-in” environment and the visitors will usually not notice any difference anyway.
- Accept a helping hand. When friends and loved ones offer to help, take them up on it. Suggest holding the baby, making a meal, going shopping for you, etc.
- Plan for meals to be prepared in bulk and freeze them. These can then quickly be heated and served instead of cooking from scratch.
- Have an exit strategy. If you feel tired and exhausted, ask your guests to excuse you so that you can take a nap.
- Know when to seek additional help. If you’re depressed or you’re having trouble adjusting to life with a newborn, consult your health care provider or mental health professional. Learning to handle the new stress in your life can help you enjoy the riches parenting has to offer. When a support person is available to take care of the baby, take advantage of the opportunity to get out on your own for some quiet time to rejuvenate, to enjoy the company of other adults or to do whatever else you feel like at the time.
